Little Feet’s Blog

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Pequenopie “Little Feet” July 19, 2009

baby feet 12

I had a talk with my sister about some of the frustrations that I am encountering. With the wait and needing to come up with so much money for the cost and fees of adoption. I am also having a hard time with seeing those around me that are in the process of adoption, getting their children or almost. Even though some of them have waited years and years, and may have no other children. I can see how those women who are going through infertility, see babies everywhere. How so many every day things are directed towards children and family. Commercials, movies, shows, babies everywhere at stores and walking down the street. There is no where to hide from these feelings.

In this discussion and thinking how I feel about things, she talked about a monopoly game. Sitting in jail watching others keep on playing and you are just stuck. I thought of uno and getting the skipped and reversed card. You are ready but you have no control, you keep watching and waiting for your turn. Debbie mentioned it’s sorta like one step forward, two steps back. This happens in so much of life but I think it is a accurate explanation of how I feel.

I have been looking into selling things on our blog to help support us. I was so excited earlier this week, that I was approved to sell handmade bracelets that were made from the people in Philippines. I also put a donate button on this blog to allow people to help us, to partner with this journey. But then it can look so insurmountable and too hard to achieve.

I will continue to try and have faith. That God put this desire in our hearts and soul. I might not know or see how this is all going to work out, but it sure will be amazing.

Thanks for everyones support and prayers. I will put the bracelets on soon, so everyone can see them.

More to come Later!

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Pequenopie “Little Feet” May 7, 2009

nepal-fb1 Lately I have been  having times of  doubt and really not having as much patience as I should have. I have looked at how much money we are going to need for this adoption and it feels so overwhelming. I realize that this economy is not good, people are loosing jobs and their houses right and left. I also know that Michael and I can’t do this on our own, that we need support. 

I feel so ready to get this process going, it’s been 6 long months since I got home from China. If feels like 6 years or a lifetime. When you are ready for this, it’s all you can think about. Sometimes I have such a huge amount of faith and all around me I see this is possible, that God will do this for us. But other times I have doubt and fear and questions. I know God has put this in my heart and I know it is true. I feel the same as I did 6 months ago and if anything I feel stronger about it.

 

I know it is going to be hard, difficult and life changing. Bringing any child into your world is earth shattering. I remember being a new mom of Beka and only being 22, not knowing who this child was. I knew she was ours, I loved  her already. But no one gives you a pamphlet with instructions on how to be a good mommy or daddy. You are on your own, you are blending two sets of ideas into one. I am thankful that Michael and I have always supported each other in this life and journey.

I have to remember that even though I’m not pregnant, this is our pregnacy, to prepare and enjoy this time. To trust God that he will move heaven and earth to make what he wants happen. That by ourselves nothing can happen without him. To just have faith in him, he has worked out everything so far. Why would I stop trusting him now. The Finish Line is before us and we just need to pace ourselves to reach it, in his time and way.

 

 

A child to pour our love on…We have that to give.    

 

 

Pour My Love On You                                                    

 

I don’t know how to say exactly how I feel
And I can’t begin to tell you what your love has meant
I’m lost for words
Is there a way to show the passion in my heart
Can I express how truly great I think you are
You’re my dearest friend

Lord this is my desire to pour my love on you    

        CHORUS:
Like oil upon your feet
Like wine for you to drink
Life water from my heart
I pour my love on you
With praises like the perfume
I lavish mine on you
Till every drop is gone
I pour my love on you 

 Is there a way to show the passion in my heart
Can I express how truly great I think you are,
My dearest friend 

Lord this is my desire to pour my love on you

CHORUS

By Phillips , Craig and Dean

 

 I am writing this blog to thank all my numerous friends and family, who encourage me and tell me to take tiny steps like my blog, that God will give us provision, that God is making us wait for the child God wants for us and all the prayers that so many are sending our way.. Thank You….

 

More to come later!