Pequenopie “Little Feet” January 25, 2010
My heart is overwhelmed by the tragic lives that were taken in Haiti. Families looking for survivors, looking for mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles and their children. Haiti already had many orphans and now it sounds like there are many more. I heard about families in different countries having adoptions go through quicker, the paperwork hurried up so they could bring their children home from Haiti. What saddens me is the thousands of children that are still there, waiting for families to adopt them.
Why is adoption so expensive and takes so long, years and years. Even in Nepal the last country we looked at, it was going to cost about $15k and would take a few years. Why are there so many restrictions, some countries have limits of what your sex is, no singles. China wanted us to have $80k in net worth, with this economy in the U.S. that requirement would cause many people to not qualify. There were restrictions for age, your income, how much school you had completed, all these hoops to jump through. I understand protecting orphans, so that they don’t get abused or put in the sex trade.
But what about love?
What about a family saving a child’s life. Why should it cost thousands of dollars to adopt. In some ways it sickens me, I know some of the money supports the orphanage and that is a good thing. But in some of these countries is that really where the money is going. I also found out that there is a tax credit of about 10k, but you have to wait till the adoption is final. If for some reason you back out or don’t go through with the adoption, you don’t get to use that tax credit, you are out of luck. Shouldn’t it be easier for families to do this wonderful act of love?
Meanwhile there are children all over the world sitting in orphanages, growing older and older each year. Many of them in situations we would look at and think this is inhuman, filth, starvation and many of them never picked up day to day. Children need to be picked up and loved, to have that social interaction. It’s funny how when you adopt from these other countries many of them mention that these children can’t interact with you and may be very hard to connect with you. I heard stories of parents telling other family members not to hug or pay much attention to their newly adopted children, so that the children would continue to bond with mom and dad.
More and more families are being confronted with the costs of adoption and feeling like there is a brick wall in front of them. More and more are giving up, deciding that they can’t afford to do this thing. Why? Even if the U.S., adoption can be quite expensive, the agencies decide how much it is. We couldn’t even start the process without paying 3k and then another 5k in about a months time. Totally ridiculous, some things can be so wrong.
Shouldn’t it be about love and giving a child a chance for love and family.
Our paperwork went in last week, so we are hoping to have our license in less than a month. Also, we are hoping to get little Abby full time as soon as possible. She is almost 4 months and I remember our little girls liking their own bed and surroundings. Many nights Abby sleeps in her car seat, it is very comfy and lifts her up, so she can breathe easier with her bronchitis. No matter how many times I try to get her to sleep in her bassinet, I finally realized we both need to sleep, so what’s wrong with a car seat. Both mommy and baby sleep, that’s what matters. Anyone have any ideas? Keep in mind that she has to sleep on her back, which she hates.
Proverbs 16:3 Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.
More to come later!
Pequenopie “Little Feet” January 18, 2010
It is getting to the point that we just need our little Abby in our house full-time. It is getting harder and harder every week to drop her off with Tiffany and getting her back a few days later. We feel like she is our baby girl and we are her parents, which is wonderful. She is a part of our heart and family, she is our sweetie pie. It is just like all the other parents that bring their child home from the Hospital, they start bonding with their child. They start seeing her personality, and love to make her coo and smile.
Abby definitely lets us know when she is happy and not so happy. This past week she has been getting breathing treatments since she has a little bronchitis. She hates these treatments, at first we had a mask to use. Have you even tried to put something like that on the face of a baby. Well it’s very difficult and she just cries and cries. Poor little thing, not much you can do but just try to sing and comfort her while she is upset. Also because she has been congested, she hasn’t wanted to sleep in her bassinet or just for tiny cat naps. Well mom and baby both need rest, so I finally started laying her in her car seat. So funny and sweet, she is elevated and seems to take longer naps.
The agency was supposed to turn in our paperwork before Christmas but it wasn’t done. This is so frustrating to not have any control of how fast or slow people work. It looks like our paperwork will be turned in tomorrow, so it is just weeks away till we get our license. At this point I just need to focus on that, and how quick this is happening, even though it’s not quick enough for me.
Just 3 1/2 months ago we completed our foster care classes, and in early December we had our home visits. Tiffany told me today that she had her home visits in Feb of last year and didn’t get her license till July, which was almost double how long we’ve been waiting. Also Dawn a wonderful friend that I met in China, who is now in the U.S. and has her daughter. It took her many years to adopt from China. Also I think of all the women all over the world that have infertily problems and wait years and years. So I think I can be patient for a few more weeks, as long as it takes we know that we want her as our very own. I just pray that it comes quickly.
More to come later!
Psalm 40:1 I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry.
Pequenopie “Little Feet” January 13, 2010
What makes a dad?
God took the strength of a mountain,
The majesty of a tree,
The warmth of a summer sun,
The calm of a quiet sea,
The generous soul of nature,
The comforting arm of night,
The wisdom of the ages,
The power of the eagle’s flight,
The joy of a morning in spring,
The faith of a mustard seed,
The patience of eternity,
The depth of a family need.
Then God combined these qualities.
When there was nothing more to add,
He knew his masterpiece was complete.
Pequenopie “Little Feet” January 10, 2010
This past week has been a really difficult one and at the same time I realized some important things. It’s so important to have a support system, and to not be ashamed to use it when needed. This week we got little Abby Wednesday night, we so want her with us as much as possible and miss her little self when she’s not here. I woke up Friday morning, in the wee hours with the flu. Michael had no choice but to go to work and hoped to get home early, knowing that I would need all the help I could get with Abby. I had a little helper that took care of Abby for me, changing her diaper, feeding her bottles and watching her for me, while I laid on the couch, sick as a dog.
I don’t know what I would have done without that little angel helping me out, cause my head was killing me and I really needed to rest and get better. I was not able to care for Abby like I needed too. I remember days of having a migraine headache and hardly being able to function and being so relieved when Michael came home from work, so I could lay down. I was right back there again, I did call Tiffany to let her know I had the flu and she called me that evening asking if we wanted her to pick her up. We decided we should let her go with Tiffany, partly cause I was still so sick and not knowing if Abby would get it, we didn’t want her being only 3 months old with the flu.
It ended up being the right decision since Michael ended up getting the flu early Saturday morning. Well now that we have had our first and I pray our last flu for the year, I look back thanking Tiffany for her help. Even though I said yes, come and get the baby, part of me was thinking oh we just got her back and soon she will be our sole responsibility to care for her, even if we get sick. Tiffany of course reminded me that she and Gabby had gotten a very nasty virus or cold and how we took the baby for her. It helped her to focus on getting her and Gabby both healthy again. So this is what support is supposed to look like.
I know that Tiffany and I will continue to be supportive of each other, and continue to keep these two special girls together. Two sisters, who won’t ever have to be separated. It’s funny how sometimes you think your family is complete and then find out it isn’t. How we just thought we were going to open our home to one child, but it is not all. Not only are we opening our family up to Abby who will be our daughter, but also to Gabby, Tiffany and her family. I see Birthday parties and special outings, and am so excited to see what else will happen.
More to come later!
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Pequenopie “Little feet” January 4, 2010
This little baby was the most precious Christmas gift that we could be given. Her very first Christmas with her new family.