Little Feet’s Blog

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Pequenopie “Little Feet” February 27, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — pequenopie @ 9:58 pm

baby-8Legacy of an Adopted Child

Once there were two women who never knew each other,
One – you do not remember, the other you call mother.
Two different lives shaped to make yours,
One became your guiding star, the other became your sun.
The first gave you life, and the second taught you to live in it.
The first gave you a need for love and the second was there to give it.
One gave you a nationality; the other gave you a name.
One gave you the seed of talent; the other gave you an aim.
One gave you emotions; the other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile; the other dried your tears.
One gave you up – that’s all she could do.
The other prayed for a child and God led her straight to you.
Now you ask through all your tears the age-old question through the years;
Heredity or environment – which are you a product of?
Neither, my darling – neither – just two different kinds of love.

Author- Unknown


Pequenopie “Little Feet” February 25, 2009


So this is Sharon that I am holding at Phillip Hayden Foundation, she is 9 months old and so sweet.

I started noticing  my thoughts being about her during the day. There were many days that we were so busy touring and also doing projects for the directors of PHF, that we didn’t get to see the kids. I think we all felt this, we wanted to spend as much time with these kids as possible. We were starting to get used to the kids and nannies, and learning how to approach them. The kids and nannies were getting used to us being around also.

At first when we visited the rooms filled with the kids, there were always nannies with us. But very soon, we noticed they would all be gone, they were getting ready to feed the kids or put them down. We were trusted with their children, they could see the love we had for these kids, in the way we played, held and ministered to them.

I still felt the nannies eyes on us. I also, was very careful to always ask if I could pick up Sharon or one of the other kids. To show my respect and knowing that they were their mommies, that I would be leaving in a few weeks and maybe wouldn’t be there again.

Looking back at my journal when I was there, I was already feeling a change in my thoughts on adoption. I have three daughters, 21, 18 and almost 15. For many years now, I have felt no calling to have another child. I held our last, like she was our last. I have worked in the nursery at church and loved it but never felt like I was supposed to have another child. My sister also adopted a boy around 9 years ago and once again, felt like wow I’m so glad our girls are older. All this time being around little ones, I felt complete, I felt like our family was complete, and was happy to hand back a child to it’s mother.

But God has another plan for our family, it started to take root in China. Also knowing and wondering how can I tell my husband this. What will he think, I was already praying for God’s wisdom and asking him to speak to Michael and open and change his heart like he had been doing to me. I was past the financial, age, time  and all those issues when you consider having a child. I knew God was birthing something new in my heart.

Phillippians 2:13  For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose.

Stay tuned, more to come later!

I welcome your comments on my blog.. so comment away..


Pequenopie “Little Feet” February 19, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — pequenopie @ 3:51 pm

baby-6Mother to Child

Conceived in my heart I earnestly prayed,
But never imagined you’d come so arrayed.
Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone,
Not under my heart, but oh, so deep in it sown.
I knew from the start since the moment we met,
When my eyes gazed upon you, destiny was set,
To enter but a short journey as mother and child,
With joy and sorrows, memories to be compiled,
A mosaic of beauty with many colors entwined,
The fabric so strong, with my Savior combined.
I love you sweet child, and in time you will see,
You’re much more than chosen, but precious to me,
For God planted this yearning in me long ago,
To bring Him forth fruit, that together we grow!

–Submitted by member, Estelle


Pequenopie “Little Feet” February 15, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — pequenopie @ 4:25 am


One of the first days I remember,  Diana and I walked into the outside playground. The nannies and children were on a blanket sitting and some were in strollers.  Diana sat right down on the blanket and started trying to play with one of the kids. I didn’t know where to sit, I felt uncomfortable. These kids didn’t know me, I was a stranger to them. These Chinese nannies didn’t know me at all. I felt inadequate, unprepared. I didn’t know if I should sit or stand. I ended up sitting down but I still didn’t feel right. Some of the children, especially the girls would cry when you would look at them or try and approach them. I remembered how my girls felt when they were little when strangers would talk to them.. They would cry and cling to mommy and daddy.

After a while the nannies got up with the children and went to the swings and toys on the playground. I still felt uncomfortable, and watched Diana try to communicate with one of the nannies if she could push one of the kids on the swings. For some reason the nanny was saying no. Don’t know if this child has a medical issue or what, but I felt not prepared. How am I going to minister to these children. How can I reach them if I don’t know how.

One day early on in our trip, I was holding a child. I didn’t know if the child was a boy or a girl. All around me was noise, nannies were in the play room with us, talking all in Chinese. The tv was on in Chinese.  There were kids on the floor, in nannies laps, in baby bouncy seats and in our arms. It was wonderful and a little uneasy. We were in a foreign country, trained to know some words in Chinese and handed these babies, while the nannies watched us with  their children.

We knew we were just visitors, foreigners, in their country, in their place of work. The sun shined in the windows of the play room in the hospital building we were in. I remember looking at all these children with their dark beautiful hair and eyes. I saw Diana and Dennis holding and playing with these children.

After a few days some of us continued to go to the hospital, where the sicker kids are kept. I found out the baby I was holding was a girl, her name was Sharon. She is beautiful, with dark brown hair and dark eyes with the longest lashes. She also looked different than the other children, her coloring was a little lighter. The pediatrician we saw one day, told us they think she is part Russian, since the province  she came from, was very Russian. We were told she has club feet and a heart murmur.

This child of God’s was the one who changed everything.

“I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me.” Matthew 18:3-5

More to come later!


Pequenopie “Little Feet” February 10, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — pequenopie @ 3:50 am
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baby-4       God can change our heart in one instant.. Instantly! 

 A close friend just encouraged me, that all the process we have to go thru to adopt, is making it possible for God to put the right child in our lives. That he is perfecting the whole thing. That maybe that child isn’t even born yet. The Lord is doing this in his timing. How awesome that we can be comforted  by our Holy God, in all the things we do in our lives.


There is a little girl named Mei Mei, at Phillip Hayden. She was around 5 years old, I would guess. She was a beautiful little girl, with these big doe  eyes. She has an inoperable heart condition. We prayed, held, and feel in love with this angelic baby girl. She doesn’t have a chance to have a family, to be adopted.. But she does have a nanny that is like a mother to love her, hold her and keep her. She is surrounded with many people that love her. She will pass away one day and go home to our God, who will hold her forever in his hands.

This past week a little baby girl, died. I’m not sure how old she was and I never held her in my arms. Her name was Patti and she had a ailment that she died from. I ask for prayer for the nannies, doctors, and the missionaries that fell in love with this precious child and are feeling her loss.


Precious one,
So small,
So sweet

Dancing in
on angel feet
Straight from Heaven’s
brightest star

What a miracle
you are!

More to come later!


Pequenopie “Little Feet” February 5, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — pequenopie @ 5:17 pm


The Lord gives us a life full of  blessings, so we can bless others.  That is part of our purpose, along with sharing the gospel with others. How can we bless orphans? How can we do and help this work? Are our hearts changed? Do we see the need? Do we just see our own lives?

At Phillip Hayden Foundation, there is a little boy named Charlie. He is so sweet, the smile he gives you is like sunshine on a cloudy winter day. He threw himself bodily at us, we had to be prepared to grab him so we didn’t get hurt or him. To look at him, there were no deformities, nothing that you could see. A rambunctious, very active, crazy little boy. One day when we were visiting all the children he kept singing, singing with pure joy and a radiance that was so wonderful.

Also there is a girl named Mariah, when we were there we didn’t know what her name was. She kept grunting and smiling, this sweet toothless smile. Her teeth looked like they were rotted, but it didn’t matter. It didn’t change how beautiful she is with her little pigtails. She kept wanting to see herself on my camcorder. She was very pushy in a little girl way. This little girl stole my heart. I found out when we came home that she is partly deaf, didn’t even know at the time.

It did not  matter that she didn’t hear me, it did not  matter that I only knew a few words of chinese, it did not matter that she spoke no english. None of it mattered. I held her, played with her, sang to her, was silly with her, like I was with my three daughters. This child is a precious child of God’s. God loves her the way she is, with her toothless, pushy, heavenly  way. We communicated what we needed to, thru laughter and having fun.

I remember when my girls were babies singing pony girl pony girl, won’t you be my pony girl and putting them on my knee like a horsey ride. I was right back there after all these years and now having teenagers. When we first got there and saw some of the children, I felt intimidated and wondered how am I going to minister to these children. At first all you see are deformities, and that right there makes you feel like I am not good enough or prepared. After a while, probably a few days of being in their midst, they reach out to you and you to them.

They are children, that want to play, laugh and be held. The deformities are no longer there. You realize that they are the same as any other child, wanting love, needing love and just wanting to be loved. I noticed along with the other missionaries in my group, that while we were doing other things or sight seeing, all of our minds were on those children.


Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these”  Matthew 19:14


More to come later!